Fucking horoscope: astrology brought your demons to clean water

Сволочной гороскоп: астрологи вывели ваших демонов на чистую воду

“Not a bastard do I?” Hardly anyone asked a similar question because in your own eyes, we are always white and fluffy. It’s all around us, you know, some bastards, and strive to put a spoke in the wheels of our chariot of goodness and justice. Prepare your eyes, maybe a little prick – professional astrologers, not devoid of a sense of humor, was the most honest “asshole” horoscope. Now and find out who some “infection”, and at the same time laugh, and if you like, send to friends. Well, no offense to us, dear readers. Because each of us is an incorrigible bastard, and if you learn how to manage it sensibly, then it can be taken out by a good piece of personal gain. But let’s get to it.

  1. Aries

Crazy Bastard.

The unbalance of this Zodiac sign is breaking all records. Screwed up – and then either falls to his knees, asking for forgiveness, or even turns away, nose up, because it is not Imperial this business – to ask for forgiveness.
Excuse: “the Devil made me do it”, “I’m Sorry, wasn’t myself”, “something rolled”.

2. Taurus.

Well thought out and pragmatic Bastard.

Believe me, it is useless to ask Taurus if he understands what he’s done. Of course, thinking. He had figured out in advance the consequences, and knew how to inflict the most painful blow possible.

Excuses: “You deserve it”

3. Gemini.

Thoughtless Bastard.

Often, this sign simply does not understand that behaves like the last scum (pair of convolutions to the analysis of their actions somehow do not have). About his mischief forgets after a couple of minutes.

Excuses: “are You offended? Why?”

4. Cancer.

All-Of-Yourself-A Lame Bastard.

You’re the bastard, and he was an innocent victim of circumstances. And be prepared to get used to it. Moreover, Cancer will make sure the news about your low act spread around the world.

Excuses: “You’re making me do!”

5. Lion.

Narcissistic Bastard.

He is great and mighty, he is king, all others are trash. It is here where all of his dirty tricks.

Excuses: “I wanted to.”

6. Virgin.

Vindictive Bastard.

One has only to cross the road somewhere not there (or just failed to comment on her) – win! Representatives of this sign have waited long enough for a convenient excuse to vent all of the swamp, which had accumulated inside of them.

Excuses: “I?! Yes, as you might think!” or “do you remember…”.

7. Libra.

Cowardly Bastard.

Libra deserve 1 place like no other. It is despicable, immoral creature. Here lied, then lied, there is betrayed – and it is normal for them. Mainly, this is due to cowardice.

Excuses: none. Naughty and ran away.

8. Scorpio.

Principled Bastard.

From the point of view of its sophisticated Outlook on life you broke a hundred thousand bans and should be punished accordingly. Scorpions consider themselves true creators of Justice (with a capital letter).

Excuses: They’re just arrogant raise of the chin.

9. Sagittarius.

The Scandalous Bastard.

A woman marketplace, ham tram… Get pleasure from the existence of conflicts.

Excuses: incoherent screaming, soiled mats.

10. Capricorn.

Stubborn and tight Asshole.

Indifference Taurus + Leo selfishness + his personal, unique stupidity. Well, a bit of greed as a condiment.

Excuses: “it happened”.

11. Aquarius.

Cynical Bastard.

This badge of honor 2nd place after Weights. Aquarians are happy to do stuff only to then make fun over you.

Excuses: “ha Ha”.

12. Fish.

Indifferent Bastard.

When the Fish hear the cries of “Help,” they shut the window and bundle up tightly in a blanket. Yes, to the hospital to say goodbye, he will not come to you, don’t wait.

Excuses: “Every man for himself, sorry.”

Remind me who always had money: astronomers have made the horoscope of the richest signs of the Zodiac: who like money, and it’s mutual.

Znayu urges not to miss the horoscope on 6 Dec, you will succeed!

Also astrologers have called 10 of the happiest baby names in 2019.

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